Let Go

"Everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it."


Our impulse is always to hold on.
to him, to her, to it.
to the way it was.
to the way we hoped it would be.

but you need to let go.
let go of what is no longer serving you.
let go of whatever is keeping you from moving forward.
let go of whatever you're so attached to that you can't see where you're going.


let go of that relationship,
that friend,
that job,
that past,
that false hope,
that dream for the future.

Letting go is scary.
It's a free fall, an act of surrender.
It's releasing things you thought were important,
+ then being okay with the fact that they're gone.

tears are a doorway to the future,
+ so it letting go.

take responsibility.
consciously decide to let go.
take an active role in your healing.
be intentional about letting go.

we are not used to letting go.
we are used to handing on.
hanging on for dear life.
we hang on for a lot of reasons.
the past is known, but the future is a big question mark.
we think the past is the best there is for us.
our past is a comfort to us.
people are a safety blanket.
we are afraid to let go and free fall.
but in letting go we might actually be afraid of finding ourselves.

all of our memories have crafted our identity.
the way it was,
the way we used to be,
the way you thought it would always be.
these memories enslave us.
layer upon layer of memories we are hanging onto.
it's hard to let go of an old identity + move on.

letting go is belief that you will find better.
it's terror + freedom,
it's trust + faith,
its believing.

unfortunately there isn't always room for the old + the new at once.
we have to let go of the old, to experience the new.
we must free up our energy, our attention.
surrender leads to new possibilities.

and we must be okay with the fact that letting go could lead to nothing.
we could be left alone, + that's okay.
the old may not be replaced with a new right away.
we may be left with absence.

stop hoping things will change.
things will not change.
it's time for you to move forward.
don't let this person, or this thing, keep lingering there.
make a clean break + be intentional.
this piece of your life has served it's purpose,
+ it's purpose is finished.
you can't take it with you anymore.

know this,
in your emptiness, there is room for so much more.



be inspired.
Natalie

a constant in the chaos

life can be chaos.
it can be so much, all at once.
my life have been anything but calm lately.
i'm sure a lot of you can relate.

life can be lonely.
there can be so much going on around you,
but yet you feel so alone.
my life has been quite isolated lately.

and yet all around me is chaos.
tragedies, struggles, tears, strife.
from being a teacher,
to being a supportive friend,
to being an emergency responder,
to being a negotiator in the midst of fighting,
to being a leader and a mother figure,
i've been a lot of things lately.
and it gets hard.
simple as that.

thank God for good mothers.
and good coffee.
and drawing.
and working out.
and warm quiet apartments.
and good tv shows.
and loving pets.
and music.
these have been my sources of sanity.

in the midst of my chaos I feel very alone.
so much is going on, but no one is here to share life with me.
people are fleeting.
people are so inconsistent.
people leave you.
people come + go.
this has been my life.
and when someone comes back in, I try to latch on to them.
just to feel a little bit of love.
to feel safe + secure.
to have a glimpse of consistency.
even if it's the wrong people for me to be latching onto.

I think we were made to love, + be loved.
we are relational beings.
we want attention.
we want relationship.
and seasons of solitude can be really hard.
but boy, do you learn a hell of a lot about yourself.
and its raw.

i've been in a season of solitude for a long time now.
at the end of the night, I only belong to myself.
there are no consistent people in my life.
besides my amazing mother.
i've had a lot of people in + out.
but this has been more harmful than helpful.

I could go on + on about my life,
but this is more so an outlet for me, not for you.
a place to get my thoughts + my life down on paper.
well, sort of.
so I can see it.

how would I describe my life lately?
inconsistent.
chaotic.
confusing.
lonely.
soul-searching.
emotional.
emotion-less.
back + forth.
in + out.
here + gone.
gut-wrenchingly real.
so real.

I can honestly say I have yet to visit this place.
God has yet to bring me here.
so i'm still trying to figure out what to do exactly.
and it's a very inconsistent ride.

but God is good.
through it all HE IS GOOD.
he is a good Father.
and I love him as much now as I did before.
before this season he put me in.

a constant in the chaos.
a solid rock that will never leave.
when seasons change, he still remains.
when everyone leaves you, he is still here.
and he knows your heart, always.
I lean on Him right now.
because everyone else is fleeting.
people are fleeting.
emotions are fleeting.
situations are fleeting.
but God is not fleeting.

This song has been following me, closely by my side.
during this lonely season, I am reminded of this truth.
go listen.
for me it brings tears. and chills. and rawness. and realness.
He is a good father, and I am loved by Him.

https://youtu.be/VKvCpAFcjI8

God is loving you through this

God is loving you through all of this.
He loves you so much.
He just wants the best for you.
When we choose to turn away from God, we will always suffer a loss.
And trust me, the pain will come.
There is pain when we lose things that were gained when God wasn't in the picture.
Like a relationship that ended, because God wasn't at the center.
God is jealous for you. Did you know that?
Like a mother to her child, God would love to just take the pain away,
to suffer for us so that we don't have to.
But in suffering you grow. you mature. you're refined. you find yourself.
You learn.
You change.
And there is beauty from the ashes.
God takes what was meant for bad, and uses it for good.
He has that power.
Impossible things are done in the name of Jesus.
He can take the pain, and make something beautiful.
Turn our messes into masterpieces.

He is loving you right now.
I know you've heard the word "love" thrown around in your life.
many times you've heard "I love you" without the actions to prove it.
But God's love is different.
He loves you always. relentlessly. unconditionally. totally. fully. always.
And unlike people, God will never ever leave you.
He is loving you right now, in this battle.
He feels your pain.
He knows your heart.
He counts your tears.
He's watching you. and his heart breaks for you.
But you just have to trust Him with this.
Ask Him for that trust.
He's taking care of you, in this battle.
every minute of every day. do you realize that?
He loves you so much.
He's right here taking care of you. and he wants to give you His best.
He wants you to have all that he planned for you. his plans, not yours.
and His plans are the best anyway.
God is loving. caring. faithful. just. righteous. powerful. good. so good.
Know his characteristics. learn who God it is. It will help you.
Don't forget that God is loving you right now, in this battle you're going through.
and He will be faithful to you no. matter. what.

you are right where he wants you to be.
there is freedom in His name.
He can free you from whatever you are in bondage to. whatever you are stuck to.
do you feel claustrophobic? are you in captivity?
God brings freedom.
He will deliver you.
but He will deliver you in His timing, not yours.
Do you realize that he could instantaneously deliver you right now?
if he really wanted to, he could deliver you in an instant.
But sometimes that's not the point.
What does he need you to get out of this? what is He needing you to get??
trust.
He knows what He is doing.
Remember who you're dealing with here. the God who created you.

Can you say, "God you're good enough for me, no matter what I go through." ?
Yes there are bad things happening, but I cling to you.
I know you love me.
I know you want to be with me.
We have our own definition of need, but God is already fulfilling our true needs.
He knows what we need right now.
And you want to know the best part?
God is not uncertain about anything. He is certain.
God is not worried, he is not unsure.
God is certain about you. He knows His plans for you. He knows everything about you.


Just know that God loves you. real love. never leave your side love. rescue you love.
And while you suffer He is right there loving you.
teaching you.
shaping you.
molding you.
changing you.
healing you.
and it's all for your good.
                                          

 

 

To my women - know your worth

 

 

Women. Know your worth.

Know that you are worthy.

You are more than enough.

Know yourself.

And love yourself.

You deserve respect, love, faithfulness.

You deserve it all.

God loves you.

You are His daughter.

He has your back.

Don't let a man make you feel unworthy.

Don't let a man break you down.

Your worth, your identity, is not dependent on any man.

A man does not define you.

There is nothing wrong with being alone.

There is nothing wrong with y o u.

Know your worth.

Know what you want, and more importantly, what you deserve.

You need a man who wants you.

Not a man who needs you, or relies on you.

A man who has genuine love and adoration for all that you are.

A man who simply w a n t s you.

All of you, forever.

He will do whatever it takes, every day.

He will be there.

His love will be proven to you.

You will feel important.

His effort will be clear.

 

But when a man let's you down, know that it is not you.

That falls on him, period.

Do not take it out on yourself.

Many men like the idea of you.

But they are not mature enough to handle the reality of you.

Don't you dare feel bad about yourself when someone doesn't want you.

Or when someone chooses to hurt you.

It's not you, it's them.

It is their character, their heart.

Not yours.

Don't you forget your worth.

Don't settle for less than you know you deserve.

Be confident in being alone.

Until a man walks into your life and proves himself.

You have a lot of love to give.

You deserve to be picky.

If a man cannot step up to the plate

then be okay with that.

Walk away.

Trust God's plan.

Wait for the right man who will love you selflessly.

A man whose focus is y o u, and not himself.

Know your worth.

You deserve the best.

You are an amazing woman.

No man should ever define your worth.

You will always be beautiful.

Hold tightly to the One who holds your future. 

 

Let Him Win Your Heart

I have yet to meet a woman who dreams of a wimpy, insecure guy who has no clue how to lead or take initiative in a relationship. But few women realize that when they steal a guy’s position and become the initiator rather than the responder, they shape men to be wimps, not warriors. Most women are so eager for a guy’s approval that they carelessly throw themselves at any guy who looks their way. Among today’s love hungry women, a man typically doesn’t have to work very hard to win a woman’s heart and attention. In fact, often all he needs to do is flirt for a couple minutes and the next thing he knows, she’s completely given her heart, emotions and even her body to him. Just like settling for less than a Christ-built man, throwing yourself at guys cheapens the amazing work Christ has done for us. He gave up His very life to make women into his radiant princesses. So why should women take such a gift lightly  by throwing our feminine hearts to anything male that moves? Our heart, emotions, innocence and physical purity are gifts from heaven. These treasures are only to be entrusted to one man (our future spouse) and only after he is truly worthy of such a gift.

Though most modern guys might appear to want women who are aggressive and easy to get, this kind of femininity is not what will capture the heart of a Christ-like man. God designed men to diligently and valiantly pursue a woman. Guys are naturally intrigued by a woman of mystique, a woman who isn’t willing to auction her heart & body to whomever passes by. If a man actually has to work to win a woman’s heart, he will be far more likely to cherish and appreciate the gift he’s labored so hard for. On the other hand, if a woman throws herself at him, though he may initially respond, he won’t have much respect or appreciation for her, and he will never learn how to cherish the treasure of her heart.

 

“But taking the initiative stage with a guy, even in the friendship stage, can be dangerous. God designed men to be leaders, the initiators and the pursuers of a relationship. The way you approach the early stages of a relationship can set the tone for the entire relationship. When women pursue men, the man’s masculine role is diminished, and this hinders them from becoming the strong, confident leaders that God intends for them to be. When a woman takes a leadership role, she subtly disregards a man’s authority and position. If women take the lead in a friendship or relationship with a guy, the weight falls on their shoulders to guide and govern the relationship from that point forward- which is completely backward from God’s intent for relationships.”

 

-Answering the guy questions-
Leslie Ludy

Daughters of God

She wept and laughed with all her heart.
She owned her mistakes & continued to walk steadily down the path laid before her.
She had power & command, yet she never allowed it to strip her of compassion.
She had a great sense of humor.
She had clear direction and purpose.
She refused to negotiate with the enemy.


These are character traits worthy of every women's attention & development.


daughters are filled with love, beauty, hope and tenderness.
a daughter smiles, hugs and laughs.
she is a seeker of the truth and asks many questions.
longing to know who she is.
she is a friend, and a comfort.
a daughter is a precious pearl.


Daughters of God.


we are connected, us daughters.
we do not need to be related by blood, we are related by Jesus.
anyone who does the will of my father in heaven, is my brother & sister and mother.
matthew 12:50
sometimes we recognize our spiritual DNA inside of someone else.
we feel connected to them, somehow.
soul sisters and brothers and mothers...
we find those people who teach us something about ourselves.
we see ourselves in them.
they serve a purpose, maybe for a few months, years,
maybe for a lifetime.


Let your past be your teacher, let your future be your friend.


when I met with her, she always encouraged & nurtured the gift of God in my life.
each time I saw her she spoke words of reassurance and wisdom.
she dropped such things as precious jewels into my lap.
lessons she learned through hardship and suffering she offered freely to me.
and she was honest.
the greatest gift she ever gave me was her belief in the calling on my life.
she saw something in me.
maybe it was her own self she saw in me, for that season.
heaven only knows, but she loved me so well.


So you see, faith by itself isn't enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is worthless.


We all want to feel noticed, acknowledged, touched and drawn in.
In light of this, the house of God is where we should feel embraced, warm, safe & sound.
amongst other Christians we are filled up.
but our nurture should not be confined to the Christian realm.
we must then take it out into the world.
we must reach out and touch others everywhere we go.
so many daughters are out there waiting to be noticed.

what to do when the roof caves in

When it all caves in...
We must ask ourselves,  is a cave-in really happening?
We need to avoid "awful-izing" what is happening to us.
Level headed thinking.
What we think can totally skew what reality really is.


As Christians we think calamities should not happen to us.
It messes with our minds.
Our faith in God should prevent devastation from happening to us..
Right?
We allow small calamities, but never the big stuff.
We begin to question God.
Is he indifferent to the suffering of his children?
Does he not love us?


When our life caves in, many times the solution requires us to think outside the box.
And many times, our problems can be solved simply by changing our way of thinking.
Sometimes changing your way of thinking wont make the problem disappear,
but it can change the way we respond to it, and how defeated we allow ourselves to feel by it.
Is your reaction to one of life's problems based on what you truly believe.?
If you're a Christian who responds with doubt in God, is that truly what you believe?
Where is your faith?
Sometimes we respond to calamity in a way that is out of our character.
In those cases, we must stop and reevaluate ourselves.


To think is to apply reason to a situation.
To believe is to have faith in a situation.


But don't get me wrong,
there are some cave-ins that are out of our control.
When devastation occurs, we have two choices.
We can pull ourselves out from under the rubble,
or we can curl up and lie there,  in hopes to die.
Sometimes we feel such pain that our faith alters, or we lose it all together.
and sometimes we have no idea how to fix this loss of faith & doubt in God.


"I'll never fully understand evil, and why it hits some,  skips others,  or totally buries a few "


What I do know is this.
When Adam and Eve disobeyed God, the universe fell under the weight of that sin.
And we have lived under the rubble of that cave-in ever since.
God did not will for devastation to fall upon us.
To sin was a human choice,
We were meant to live in a world devoid of "cave-ins"
To sin was a human choice, and God allowed that human choice.
But now,  as we sit in the disastrous consequence of that choice,
God promises to bring good out of the bad.
That is his sovereign intent.

As hard as it may be,  we must believe that God will bring beauty from ashes.
That there will be beauty from pain.
God will work everything together for the good of those who love him..
We must believe that there are treasures found in darkness.
It may not be possible to see the good in the midst of the bad,
but we must believe that it will be revealed to us someday.
There is wealth for our souls hidden in the mess of those cave-ins.
And this wealth for our souls is the kind that can only be found in darkness.
In darkness, we discover God's abundant love.
it is a love that never fails, no matter what the circumstance.
Nothing can separate us from God's love.


Some cave-ins can be prevented,  others not so much.
In the beginning,  humans chose to sin, to go against God.
now we live in that consequence.
We choose to sin, others choose to sin against us.
this world is filled with good, and evil.
we will never fully understand evil, or why certain things happen.
but we mustn't blame God for devastation.
God loves us, and he always will.
he is the only constant,  good,  sovereign thing we have in this world.
Nothing will take his love away from us. Not a thing.
and even though our trials are unwanted,  unnecessary, & unbearable,
GOD WILL WORK ALL THINGS TOGETHER FOR OUR GOOD.

and that is a promise.
rest in him.
let him carry you.
held in his arms.





to be continued...
Natalie